Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Getting Things in Order X -- Mothering

As to the specifics to my mothering role. ...  I sat down with some paper and made a list of things that occurred to me and then tried to divide them into categories.  This is the inductive or "untying the Gordian knot" approach which seems to work better for complex, multifaceted affairs where you don't yet have the Big Picture, and an attempt to solve from above will leave out important parts of reality.

I'm just going to list it out as I did on the paper.  Obviously some of these things overlap, but that's part of the nature of knots, or tapestries, or anything where seemingly disparate things are united.    Also, I didn't put them in order of importance, just in order as they occurred to me and as things that seem to crop up regularly in life and either cause satisfaction or dissatisfaction by their presence or lack.   Also, these lists are not all-inclusive, obviously! 

Media
  • computer games
  • movies
  • social media
  • practical wisdom in weeding out untrustworthy sources and information
  • tracking down information
  • using entertaining media in an orderly, temperate way

Health and Hygiene
  • dental -- brushing teeth, dental visits
  • baths/showers
  • other personal care -- washing hands before meals, etc
  • taking care of clothes and possessions
  • eating well, staying fit
  • bedtime routine
Faith
  • sacraments -- mass, confession, other
  • private devotions -- morning offering, spiritual reading, night examen
  • family prayer
  • learning about faith

Outdoor Time
  • Daily walk or equivalent
  • Playing or reading outside
  • Outdoor work or construction projects
  • Field Expeditions or investigations
  • Sports and outdoor activities
Chores
  • Teach, hand over things gradually
  • Habits of helping -- service, looking for ways to help out
  • Kids manage own things
  • Kitchen skills
Life Skills
  • Driving, changing tires,
  • Handling money
  • Tying shoes 
  • Teach what we know, and keep learning ourselves
Adult Transition
  • College and career research
  • Volunteer/apprentice work
  • Test-taking, other forms of preparation
Therapy and Remedial/Drill
  • Home follow-up in speech and language, occupational and physical
  • Teach personal ownership of therapy and remediation
Character and Courtesy
  • Stay observant of "issues", make list
  • Figure out plans
Activities and Community Events
  • Habit of researching what's available -- keeping track of local resources
  • Sports
  • Music
  • Clubs -- eg Boy Scouts
  • Camps
  • Opportunities to do things with friends and also with new people.
Traditions
  • Family "ways" of doing various repeated things -- start simple, build.
Academics


Can you think of any other categories?   I am dealing with academics sort of separately from this, because it CAN be and HAS traditionally been delegated in a way those other things really can't be and haven't been so much, so I didn't put anything under that heading.  

Over the course of the year I'm going to write simple standards for each of these -- the regular "habits" like brushing teeth are the easiest to showcase in my daily routine while the more exterior things are also probably less essential since it doesn't necessarily matter whether a given child plays soccer or baseball, etc.

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I would love to hear your thoughts on this!